Halloween Unmasked

"Trick or Treat smell my feet give me something good to eat. If you don't I don't care I'll pull down your underwear". Remember how Halloween used to be...getting dressed up and then you and your friends would go door to door, neighborhood to neighborhood trying to get all the candy possible. We had some of the best costumes and really tried to play the character we were dressed as. Now days kids don't even dress up, the streets aren't as safe, but the tradition continues every year. There are other traditions that are being celebrated by our youth and adults now. One in particular is Gay Pride Weekend. I actually had the opportunity to attend this event for a documentary I'm filming that will be released late 2014. This celebration is a week long event to celebrate unity, visibility and self-esteem amongst homosexuals, lesbians, bisexuals and trans genders. Its one of the oldest pride parades in the U.S and was established in 1971. I didn't realize how huge of an event this was until I actually moved here to Atlanta 6 yrs ago. Everyone is dressed up in different characters it reminds you of Halloween. Atlanta is now the 9th gayest city in America, but guess who is number 1....Tacoma Washington......could have fooled me! Atlanta is flooded with gays and lesbians. This sexual lifestyle is becoming more and more socially accepted. I never been to a city where men stare at you more than the women do. I also never imagined I would see the day where I am in competition with women for other women!
People are coming out the closet willingly and unwillingly from celebrities, athletes, ministers to known politicians. Let me make myself clear I personally don't have a problem with a persons sexual preference whether its by choice or susceptible circumstance. I believe long as you happy with who you are that is all that matters everyone is not going to like you anyway. The definition of gay is to be happy so be that without inflicting your lifestyle on others. I have some concerns I would like to address to those living this lifestyle who try to recruit others through deception or prey on our innocent youth. Gay men stop trying to cover up the fact that you're gay all signs point to it: your walk, your behavior, hand gestures, the way you speak and the conscious effort to prove to everyone that you're not gay. (Unmask Yourselves) These are the guys I don't respect and I will be quick to check your neck if I have too! Don't try to befriend me with phony pretense knowing malice is in your heart to hopefully catch me in a vulnerable state. (Unmask Yourselves) To the lesbian community....I'm really good with the fems...it just puzzles me how you want another female that acts like a dude. Wouldn't it  make sense to just be with a guy, but it is what it is. Studs, some of you got the game twisted....remember you can borrow a man's swag, but you still have a female makeup so act accordingly. Please don't think you stronger than a man trying to protect your fem from being hollered at. (Unmask Yourselves) Since you dressed in character like a man I'm a treat you as such. Make sure you check your female before you dare and run up. Stay in your lane I would hate to have to 10 piece you up. (Unmask Yourselves) Finally the most disturbing is how our youth is being preyed upon and recruited. Parents beware, I witnessed this first hand by teaching in the classroom for 10 years. You have to not only take precaution with various adults who may have influence on your child, but the kids are just as bad recruiting early as third grade. They are using tactics and methods that I fond astonishing during my research. This is an ongoing epidemic and we must be aware and educated on what's going on in our schools, communities and today's society. To whom it may concern: (Unmask Yourselves)

The M Word

What's so interesting about the M word. It supposed to be a joined union between a couple who agree to sworn vows before God. The M word that I'm referring to is marriage. Now I'm not married, but from what I hear it can really be a beautiful thing. "Nothing is perfect (except God) you learn to compromise and work through your problems together." This is quoted from a couple that was married for over 35 years and who truly adored one another....my parents. So what's happening with our generation where the divorce rate is higher than its ever been in the last 25 years. 75% of married couples are predicted to be divorced within the first 10 years of marriage. These statistics raise deep concern and have people second guessing if they even want to get married.

 Now some women may say that us men are just scared of making a commitment. I will say women you all have a great point it can be scary or intimidating, but more than just the norm of settling down with one person for the rest of our natural lives. Men, we are taught to protect and provide, so just the thought of feeling inadequate or feeling the fear of failing is crucial. Its not that we cannot step up to the plate, but feeling comfortable enough knowing we put ourselves in a position to succeed in our marriage. We understand it will never be a perfect time, however how we make our money, how much money we make and a plan to sustain is imperative. Women you are always ready, not saying you don't have pressure....its just a different kind of pressure: girl you getting older, don't you want kids etc. I think people's intentions to get married are good, but we tend to marry for all the wrong reasons for ex: Don't do it thinking things or a person will change. If it was bad before he, she or it will only get worst. Don't do it because you have a child together and don't want to see another man or woman raising your child. Don't do it just for the sake of saying you're married like you're checking it off your bucket list. Don't do it if you single, still chasing and you enjoy being a hoe. You will only become a married unfaithful hoe. People kill me taking their ring off when they go out like you can turn marriage off and on like a light switch. People get married and then find out they don't want the responsibility that comes with the marriage. Men and women don't get caught up thinking that you will miss out on something or the grass is greener on the other side. Remember you are always going to see someone that is equally or more attractive than your husband or wife. Getting married shouldn't be the end of the road, the thrill is gone and the fun times are over. Its supposed to be a new beginning that you are going to share with that special person, growing and exploring life together. I don't think couples go into marriage expecting it to fail, you're hoping and praying at the alter that you're making the right decision. I know marriage is meant to be forever, but sometimes relationships just run its course and expires. I am a firm believer that you can fall out of love with a person the same way you fell in love with them. There is no blueprint to follow for making a marriage last. I personally believe the things you did that made that person want to marry you is the same excitement needed throughout the marriage. Make sure you're sincerely in love with the person that he or she is and that you can tolerate their good, bad and ugly before you say I do. For all the happily married couples that still exist...Peace onto you and may god continue to bless your union!

Relax, Relate and Release (Day 31)

Throughout this experience of being celibate for 30 days really open my eyes on the value of sex. This was perhaps the most difficult challenge I have encountered mentally. I was able to keep my mind off sex by exercising, reading and keeping myself busy. I learned how to play chess and improved my ballroom skills on the dance floor. Despite all the activities I had in place, my craving for sex intensified halfway through the journey. I think it was the fact of knowing I couldn't have it or release even if I wanted too. Temptation was everywhere, so we all had to avoid things that were associated with sex: alcohol consumption, what we watch on television and what we read. I was able to get through my day, but it was at night when it was time to sleep that frustrated me the most. Remember we were not allowed to please ourselves, so getting comfortable without your hands in normal positions made it tough if you know what I mean. I became seriously irritated and found myself counting down the days for this challenge to be over. I come to the realization that men and women need each other and shouldn't be withholding sex to prove a point or as a substitute to avoid discussing issues or problems in a relationship. Sex is a connection, chemistry and pleasure between a man and woman. It is not a punishment and shouldn't be used to hurt one another. We must satisfy each other sexual needs no if, ands or buts about it. I'm pleased with the outcome of this challenge and would like to thank everyone who participated. Here are a few responses from those that actually participated and completed the challenge:

Anonymous 1 This challenge helped me with buckling down to get goals completed. I thought this would have driven me crazy, but surprisingly enough I got through it. I got to spend some quality with my wife that did not include sex. She is just glad it is now over

Anonymous 2 I have a summary for you Rashaan don't come up with no more shit like this! LOL

Anonymous 3

My apologies I didn't have no Internet I was changing providers but I want to give a good report sir. The past 2 to 4 weeks now has been very cleansing without the added pressure as mentioned before. I truly have a mentality of carrying this beyond 30 days I'm focusing on allowing this to become of a long-term lifestyle change. It has personally made me feel more purified on a spiritual level!

 

Anonymous 4

The journey was fulfilling as we increased our mental and physical restraint against the flesh. Disciplining our minds that sex isn't a priority, but a sacrifice of self-control. This was definitely and experience to remember, but so glad its over. Now I can relax, relate and release.

 

 

Peace!